Writer's block, ughhh.

Hey guys! Honestly, I'm currently suffering from some baad writer's block AND feel like writing at the same time, so I'll just improvise and see where it ends up, hey?

My brain feels so scrambled at the moment, I got back from Fez's place about an hour ago.. I love going to his place because, besides the obvious reasons, his Mum teaches food technology at Fez's school, so her cooking is exquisite! I've never had better cous-cous in my life. :)

This evening I also rediscovered how immature and foul my humour can be, and what sick shit I find utterly hilarious, when Fez and I watched a documentary thing on the Aristocrats joke.. For those of you who don't know what that is...

Too bad. No way I'm explaining it! Hahaha. I guess some of our inner child never dies.

It's 10:56pm now, and I don't know if I can stay awake for much longer, I'm buggered. I'll get to sleep in a tiny bit tomorrow, because a certain boyfriend of mine has chosen to walk 10.3kms to my place, getting Hungry Jack's on the way.. Why? He says it's because he likes how weird and stupid it seems, and he just wants some Hungry Jacks.. I suggested just getting a lift like a sane person would, but then he whimpered in a falsetto tone, like all the males in his family do when they (proverbially or not) pout and stick their bottom lip out, "But that would take the adventure out of iiiiiiit! It wouldn't be stupid that way!" But hey, I like his little quirks, quirks in general are good with me.

Another thing I'm looking forward to is the fact that I only have 5 days left of the semester! One week!! It was a bloody 12 week term, waaaay too long for us all. And, awesome bit about the new semester approaching, is that ALEX WILL FINALLY LEAVE MY SCHOOL!!! One less hassle for me to deal with. x_x Him, and half the VCAL students will be either leaving or booted out by Andy, whom I previously mentioned in my Leadership blog. He promised me personally that "all the dickheads will be gone".. That's what I like about him, he's brutally honset, but not overly so. When I was talking to him on Frid'y morning, he was talking about this first year VCAL class, and he said "Well, class 106 is the good one, I want to move you in with them, they're good kids... Then there's a bunch of druggies in the other one..." I thought it was a tad unprofessional to say that, even when it was being said to someone that agreed, I mean, he's only been there since Monday and he's labeling people. That was certainly not the only instance he's been rather rude.

He told me about this assembly he held with all the VCAL students, and he mentioned how he thought most of them didn't want to hear the truth, and they didn't want things to not go their way, ever. I agree with him, it was a very good point, I'm not sure what he said in the assembly, though. I think it was just him explaining what changes would take place at the school. Alot of people are complaining that he's only just come in here and he reckons he runs the joint. Well, he kind of does. Their little curriculum, anyway. He's a VCAL co-ordinator, it's his job to co-ordinate them, or "run" them, these people just expect him to be a doormat until they're satisfied with him, in most cases. It shits me when people can't just do what they're told and make everyone's lives easier. It's commonplace to think being a "rebel" is cool, but really, I don't use "rebel" anymore, that's kind of been replaced by "dickhead". There are good rebels, as long as they do it out of good will, for a good cause or if it's against an injustice, not something you just don't like because you're too stubborn to see the big picture. That's not rebellion, that's just dumb. "Rebel without a cause", in my language, is basically a synonym for "obnoxious fuckhead". If you have no reason to act like a dickhead, don't! "Oh I act like this because Mummy and Daddy didn't do this and that for me and were retards and didn't understand me blah blah blah".. I'd like to send them to a third world country. Or at least to a good counsellor. I mean, I do have sympathy for them if they've been unhappy with their life, but if they use that as an excuse to act dumb, they've lost my respect.

I know I kind of sound like an authority puppet, but I'm not. I'm just reasonable, I can see through other people's perspective, and I will stand up to authority if I feel they're genuinely wronging someone, or stuffing things up for everyone.

Although, it does worry me a little bit that Andy will be kicking out most-all the students that have been there for 18 months or something, I mean, alot of them wouldn't have any place to go! He just thinks they've stuffed up their last chance, and the school is not a babysitting service. Oh, incase you're wondering, this school doesn't have year 7, 8, 9 etc, it's basically first years, second years and maybe a few third years. You only do really short courses there that can get you into a fair few things.

But yes, in that respect I can see how some of the VCAL students would be pissed off, but I don't know if they know that or not, Andy spilled alot of confidential information, I'm not supposed to tell anyone, but I'm sure this wouldn't count. ;) Most people from my school wouldn't be able to write a blog anyway! XD Sad, but true. I'm serious, heaps of the guys there have dyslexia among other learning/behaviour/personality disorders, I'm one of the few "normal" people there. Oh god, When I said "Most people from my school wouldn't be able to write a blog anyway!", I SWEAR I heard Dad's voice scolding me with "Don't mock the afflicted", which is wise, however I was only doing so in a friendly way.. They can't hear me anyway.. Or can they??

Oh, and I think I will take up the mentoring position, it sounds rewarding, there's going to be a couple of others doing similar roles too, apparently. That and Andy said he wants me to get out of the place with certificates coming out of my ears. He says that what I have should never be wasted, it's very flattering to know someone think so highly of you. He'll be talking to Mum at parent-teacher interviews on Tuesd'y, too, I'll be there, and I really want to know what he has to say, aswell as the other trainers.

Well, that's enough ranting from me. I don't know how most of you will react to my opinion, it's a little harsh, but it's honest. 100% pure honesty, right there. For now I'll just get back to listening to my favourite album EVER, "Layla and other assorted love songs" by Derek and the Dominos (the album cover is my profile image :P).. It's old, and totally not something you'd expect someone of my age to listen to, but I really love the fact that it was basically one big dedication and declaration of love to Pattie Boyd from Eric Clapton. If I was Pattie, I'd be beyond flattered, even though she was married to George Harrison at the time.. I feel like I can really relate to that love triangle, with the whole Alex thing (explained in my "This is dedicated to the one I love! :D" blog). I really look at Pattie Boyd as my style icon, too. But yes, the album.. I sung about half the songs from it the other day, along with "One more cup of coffee", which I have to duet with Fez.

Yes, I sing. :P Always have. I can't really say wether I'm good or not, I feel like if I say I'm good I'll be bragging, if I say I'm bad I'll feel like I'm lying... Ongoing compliments about it can't be wrong, compliments from the few people that I've mustered up enough courage to sing to, anyway. Call me conceited, but at least I have enough self esteem to give myself a compliment. :P Yeah, I'm paranoid about being conceited now after Alex kept throwing that word in my face, but he was used to girls that hated themselves. But if you hate yourself, how can you like anyone else?
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Comments

  1. meredith

    I still can’t believe you are only 15!!! Anyway, I love Clapton. For someone with “writer’s block”, you express yourself quite nicely.

    June 21, 2008
  2. Mezlie

    Yes, I am only 15. gets a hammer and nails it into everyone’s head :P

    Thanks anyway, Meri! Your comments are always appreciated.

    June 22, 2008
  3. Mezlie

    Thanks, TheAlreadyJaded, although I’m not sure how exactly this entry is “cute” :P either way, thanks.

    June 29, 2008