Endorphins to the rescue!

**Warning: This blog contains the "C" word, so don't read the latter half of it if you're easily offended, a millitant feminist or just a prude**

Well, here I go again. This weekend was a pretty good one, I reckon, on Friday I got Mum to write me a note to get out of school at 12:30 for a "doctor's appointment" so I could go and see Ezra when he got out of school at the same time, lucky bastard gets out early on Wednesdays and Fridays. Mum had to write a note so the school wouldn't ring my house and end up telling Dad I left, that's happened before, it ended very ugly, Mum and I had to run away awhile.

When I did go to Ezra's, yeah, had fun and whatnot, and in the evening his parents rented the movie Chapter 27, the movie about the guy that killed John Lennon. I wanted to see that movie the second I heard about it, despite hearing nothing but bad reviews. The movie definitely delivered what the reviews promised. It was a very "slow" movie, the entire 1:20 of it documenting two days of time, mostly in the hissy dialogue of the protagonist's crazed thoughts. It was pretty boring, the writers were obviously trying really hard to be creative and insightful, but it failed. The movie delivered no surprises, everyone knew what was going to happen in the end, and it wasn't very climatic. It was more of a feeling of "Great... That's it... That's what we've been waiting for the whole time, wow, I feel depressed that someone died that way. John Lennon of all people." Oh, and the prominent female character in it was named "Jude", how expected of any character in any movie that has anything to do with The Beatles. It just irritates me, can't they think of anything slightly more obscure? My rating: 1/5. 

Anyway, enough of my negative mini-reviews.

Saturday was pretty good too, depsite this constant, burning, irritating pain I felt through the course of the day which was pretty mild but it seemed so much worse after awhile and it drove me insane. I went out with Ezra that day, too, we were going to go my old home town, East Richmond, via tram, then catch a train from there into the city so Ezra could buy this guitar strap that says "Jesus" on it. When we got to the city though, was when my pain was at its worst and I felt like buckling over, but I couldn't, because we were in the city. Getting off the train at Flinders street station, I grumbled to Ezra: "I am now reminded of why I hate the city." I hate crowds. Especially the ones where it moves so slowly and people are packed in so they touch eachother. It makes me edgy. You see, I'm used to the suburbs where things are well spaced out, and where I live right now is pretty much low density sprawl. High density crowds make me very hostile because my personal space is being invaded, badly. Because I was in constant pain I was even more hostile, bumping randoms out of the way and cursing loudly at one guy that nearly knocked me off the escalator. Normally I'm not that bad, don't worry!

Unfortunately, the Jesus strap wasn't there, and Fez just bought a cheapo one. He's been all out on music lately because he's in this band now, called *rolls eyes*... Cunt Vader. Yah. I hate it too. But his explanation for it is: "Yeeah, we know it's a crap name, but we're a grunge band, rough around the edges, so our name is also, well, rough around the edges." Fair enough, but I still shake my head every time I hear it. When they list themselves down for things, though, they just call themselves "Kent Vader", which is a relief. Well, they're smart kids.

I felt sorry for Ezra yesterday, too, because I was being a right pain. I was constantly complaining and wincing in pain, and generally being in a bad mood. This only really kicked in once we got on the train to the city, though. Once Ezra dragged me around Melbourne Central station wildly, looking for a train that stopped at Burwood station, I nearly reached breaking point. I literally yelled out, "ARE WE GOING ON A WILD GOOSE CHASE?!?!" and grumbled angirly as I was being dragged. Eventually, we just settled for a train which stopped at Mount Waverley station, as that's the second closest to my house. We could have taken the tram, but it was too far a walk back to the tram stop and Ezra just wanted me to sit down quicker. He was being such a lovely, caring boy.

But once we sat down at the platform, I was muttering crazily to myself, trying to distract myself from the pain, with Ezra holding me and being stoic. I must have looked like a real nutcase. Once we got on the train, something I said frustrated Ezra, and pissed him off, and we were on an almost empty carriage, so I didn't hesitate to start crying. I just felt like a burden to Ezra, all I did was wreck his day by complaining all the time. I frequently feel like I'm a bad girlfriend because of my almost crippling insecurities and how much I whine and take my stress out on him, yet he, being the saint he is, helps me through it and doesn't get pissed off with me much, but apparently I was going that bit too far. But, surprisingly, after I had a cry for awhile and put my feet up, I felt a lot happier and better. I guess the moral of this story is, sit down and cry when you can, it releases endorphins!!

And today, I haven't done anything, I watched my beloved football team, The Richmond Tigers, get thwarted by The Adelaide Crows, which was pretty sad, I was so confident we'd beat them. I'm not that heartbroken, though, because Adelaide's my tertiary team, the other side of my family goes for them, my secondary being The St. Kilda Saints as Ezra and his family go for them, and I have some of their "attire" and everything. They're trying to convert me!! Nooooooooo!!

And Ezra's been at rehearsals with Cu-I mean-Kent Vader today. I'm really happy for him, these are a lovely bunch of guys he's playing with, and it gives him direction with his guitar playing. He's a very talented kid, it needn't go to waste.

Well, I hope you all had a great weekend, and don't forget to cry when you need to!! 
Love and hugs, ♥Mez♥ 
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  1. EasyToSay

    Enjoyable read Mez, you really do have a way with words.

    And never never change footy teams! That is a golden rule that goes way back to the VFL days…. I don’t really get people having a “second team” even when their love barracks for a different team.

    Foty barracks for Collingwood, and I for Carlton, so as you can imagine (mixed-marriage) I hated Collingwood, brainwashed early. If you barrack for Carlton you hate collingwood. Well now foty has given me another reason to hate them! lol.

    Hope your pain wasn’t anything serious.


    August 10, 2008
  2. Mezlie

    Thanks, K!

    Hell no will I ever convert! And thank Christ you didn’t convert to Collingwood. Collingwood supporters are too painfully common in this fine city of ours… Isn’t it funny that foty goes for them? Hahaha! Too funny. But I’ve always liked Carlton, always been fond of them.. you guys have Fev. He’s such a meathead, but he’s a talented meathead.

    And naaaah, it’s not serious, mostly gone away now. I’ll be right.

    August 10, 2008